Dear Deanna!

My best friend wants me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding.  I want to decline because her future husband is cheating.  He’s been seeing someone else the whole time he’s dated my friend.  I don’t want to tell her because it would break her heart, but I don’t want her to marry him either.  Do I need to go through with the wedding to make her happy or risk the friendship by telling her?

Shannon                      Omaha, Neb.

Dear Shannon: 
You’re a lousy friend because you should be able to tell your best friend anything.  You would be as guilty as the future husband if you know he’s cheating but won’t tell it.  They’re going before God with adultery on the plate and you can prevent this by being mature and doing the right thing.  Pray for strength and words of wisdom as you get the facts.  Tell your friend about the situation, and you’ll be able to sleep better at night.

Dear Deanna!
I met a guy a few years ago and we really felt a spark.  I was dating someone else but dumped him for the new guy.  He had also met another female at the same time.  As luck would have it, I said or did something that spooked him and he started dating the other lady.  I went on with my life.  After two years of staying in touch, his relationship ended and he’s back.  He’s still friendly with this ex-girlfriend and I’m scared to go back for fear he’ll do the same thing again.  What do I do?

Confused                      Sacramento, Calif.

Dear Confused: 
This isn’t the only man you can have a relationship with and I suggest you look elsewhere.  If he dumped you the first time for someone else, he’ll do it again.  However, if you’re still feeling the spark, observe him much closer and take your time before getting too serious.  A woman’s sixth sense is real.  If your gut feeling is telling you to run or something’s not right, spare yourself some pain and follow your instincts.

Dear Deanna!
In my marriage I always listened to my husband, let him make decisions and manage the finances.  Recently I was devastated to learn that he has a double life with another wife, children and a home.  I’m ready to stand up and fight, but he’s a bully and scaring me.  Is it worth it to get what’s right for me and my children or should I let him go and let things catch up in the long run?

Anonymous Dallas, Texas

Dear Anonymous: 
You can wait for the long run but you’ll find yourself on the curb with your kids looking stupid.  You’re entitled to alimony, child support and everything else as a result of his decision to commit adultery, be a liar and a two-timing bigamist.  As the first wife, you have the court’s favor as well as the favor of God as you proceed.  Your husband didn’t think of you, your kids or the other woman while doing his dirt so why should you? Call the judge, handle your business and keep it moving.