UNITED STATES—This weekend may have been one of the worse, Father’s Day that I have ever experienced in my life. To even write this column is difficult, but I’m doing so as a way of dealing with my emotions and raising awareness of violence, especially when it’s one family member against another. Who could imagine a child attacking their father on Father’s Day of all days?

I couldn’t but that is precisely what my little brother did to his father. He’s adopted and he has been spoiled rotten his entire life. He has no idea how could of a life he has. He has no idea what the word ‘responsibility’ means and totes himself as an adult, but fails to realize adults don’t look to their parents to solve every problem they have. Too bad no one has taught this kid otherwise.

Without getting into all the logistics, things got quite violent, the police was called and a family was shattered in the midst of all this chaos. So many people wanted my brother to be taken by the police, but his stubborn mother wouldn’t acknowledge that her son needs some tough love, I hate to say it, but his a** needs to be scared straight, like really scared. I got injured along the way, and the emotions I dealt with on Sunday were a whirlwind, I was pissed, I was livid and my brain was all over the place. My brother attempted to give me a half-a** apology, but I didn’t want to hear it. My honest response was “Get the hell out of my face and keep your distance from me.”

He seems to think it’s no big deal; he seems to think this will just be swept under the rug as if nothing had happened to begin with. Oh, no, we’re done, at least for the time being, I have lost tons of respect for him, I no longer view him as the same person, and if he thinks this relationship will be the same he is about to be stunned. I think he is embarrassed, but until I get an apology that is from the heart and I can sense the regret, remorse and honesty, he’s cut off from me. I hate to say that, but sometimes tough love is the only way to truly get into the psyche of a person to make it clear that there are indeed consequences for your actions.

I can only imagine trying to wrap my head around what my father is feeling right now, what he equates Father’s Day to after this incident. Likely, violence and the fact that he has a child whose level of respect for him is so LOW it’s unfathomable to even want to be in the presence of this person.

What I will say, is that the family has indeed had a discussion. This isn’t something that could be swept under the rug. Why? Well it is embarrassing to say the least. The entire neighborhood heard what transpired, the cops were at our doorstep, property was damaged. I mean this kid broke a $1000 TV, broke a toilet, bite someone, wanted to play with knives, etc.

He needs to be committed; sometimes there are people who can’t be helped, unless they’re willing to help themselves first. There is something off in the brain, and if he or his mother thinks this behavior is acceptable, I have no trouble cutting someone out to ensure my safety and the people I care about is a top priority. I haven’t had a conversation with my brother since the incident, and at the moment I don’t plan on it.

He needs to get a realization that he has a problem, and there are indeed consequences for what he has done. Does he care? I honestly don’t know, but all those freebies and things that I used to do, have been completely cut off. We will not be buddies like in the past, he has to earn back my respect, and show some level of redemption that I have yet to see, and I question rather I will ever see it. It’s easy to love someone when its family, but when that family member resorts to violence to inflict harm on someone, it’s just as easy to cut them off, which is shame to say the least.

Family Dynamic Shattered was originally published on San Francisco News