UNITED STATES—Children nowadays are on a rampant overkill. They fail to acknowledge the ramifications of their actions. They are so quick to grow up; they refuse to acknowledge wrong doing. Why is that? Parents are no longer taking the initiative to be parents; they are attempting to be ‘friends.’
What is the problem with a parent attempting to be their child’s ‘friend’ versus the ‘parent?’ You create a level of conflict that is impossible to differentiate. When a child begins to sense the parent as someone who is no longer an authority figure, attempts to regain that control is impossible; the child no longer respects you.
When I refer to the term respect, I’m not arguing that the child disrespects the parent, its just they no longer look at you seriously. The fine line has been broken, and it will take time for the child to warm up to the notion that the parent is the authority figure. Parents who attempt to ‘purchase’ their child’s love fail to realize that children can see through this. They build a bond with you on the perception that you will provide them with the amenities that they want; once they have it, you no longer matter in their eyes. How exactly is this bad for the parent?
It opens the door for the child to run a moss; they begin to build the notion that they are the adult and the parent is the sidekick. The buddy aspect is stuck in their notion and difficult to shake. The concept of doing chores, going to school or following daily instructions are thrown out the window.
We’ve highlighted why these would be issues for the parent, but how does this effect the child. They fail to appreciate the irreversible ability to enjoy childhood and being a teenager. Once those golden years have passed, they’re gone, they don’t come back. In addition, the maturity level of the child has not reached the education and experience that a typical adult has.
It opens the door for the child to get themselves into situations where they may not make the wisest decisions. When a child feels overwhelmed they turn to peers for advice, not the smartest idea. You may end up putting yourself in further trouble than what you were already in. So how do adults keep a tight leash on their children from running amok? Discipline!
While it’s tough to set down strong consequences for bad behavior, the child will respect you more in the long run, as it’s for their own good. Rewarding bad behavior just allows the door to stay open for the child to continue engaging in such tomfoolery. The problem with that is at some point mommy and daddy can’t bail the child out and an entire new explosion of issues come to the forefront; blame is placed on one party over the other. Instead of pointing fingers, take responsibility and do the right thing from the start.
By Trevor Roberts