Dear Deanna!
   I’m stressed over my relationship and don’t know what to do. My boyfriend plays mind games with me and I never know where I fully stand. One day he seems to love me to death and others he seems as if he wants to walk out the door. I feel suspicious that he may have someone else but I can’t confirm it. He comes home every night and he may be moody or short tempered most times but at least he’s at home. Can you help me figure out what I’m doing wrong?
Trinae
(Dallas, TX)

Dear Trinae:
   You’re making the mistake of wasting your time hoping this man will trip and fall in love with you and tell you what you want to hear. He’s not connected to you and there’s someone or something else pulling him away. He may be with you each night but his attitude and temperament indicates he doesn’t want to be there. The end of your relationship is near and you should enjoy the ride and prepare to move on because the end is certainly on the horizon.
Dear Deanna!
   My wife has become a stranger that I don’t recognize anymore. She’s defensive when I ask personal questions and always has a chip on her shoulder. I love her but I am not going to be mistreated, used or disrespected. She is pushing things too far now because she’s embarrassing me in front of her friends. I don’t know what is happening but her appearance, her mood and everything about her is different. How can I get to the bottom of these changes?
Anonymous
(On-Line Reader) 

Dear Anonymous:
   Your wife is showing guilty signs of having an affair. Whomever she is seeing has boosted her self-image, her confidence and she’s become happy and bold. However, when she returns to reality and sees your face, she becomes deflated and rude which causes her to lash out at you over simple things. You need to a real man and share your concerns, point out the changes and either accept or reject her explanations and keep it moving.

Dear Deanna!
   I loaned money to my girlfriend’s husband and now he won’t pay the money back. I did this personal favor without talking to my friend first. He is now telling me to stop harassing him or he’s going to accuse me of trying to sleep with him. I’ve been sending him e-mails to call along with text messages and I’ve called his cell phone. I thought I was doing the right thing by not mentioning the loan. How do I get my money without jeopardizing my friendship?
Miss CeeCee
(Atlanta, GA) 

Dear Miss CeeCee:
   It’s to your advantage to go ahead and write the money off unless you’re willing to bring drama in your life. If there’s no promissory note or paper trail indicating you loaned the money and it would be paid back, you’re stuck. You’re being blackmailed and it’s going to get worse. Tell your friend about the loan, stop looking for payment and whatever happens in their relationship is not your fault because you chose to be honest and have integrity.