Dear Deanna!
   I had a friend who was lonely and unhappy, so I decided to help her. I asked her to be my roommate and introduced her to my crowd. She later told our mutual friends about my personal business and she became best friends with them.  They told lies about me around campus, my grades deteriorated and I lost my friends. I have wanted to get back at her for backstabbing me.  How do I repair a ruined reputation and deal with these vicious two-faced people?
   Totally Ruined                        On-Line Reader

Dear Ruined:
   Consider yourself lucky that your so-called friends have been revealed as wolves.  These weren’t your friends to begin with and you shouldn’t let them see you stress.  Hold your head high, get a life and find a new set of friends with high values and morals.  The two-faced people are beneath you and you should separate yourself.  Get a tutor to help pull your grades up, and stick with people that have common interests.  Stay positive, smile and keep it moving.

Dear Deanna!
   My girlfriend is sending mixed signals about our relationship.  At times, she makes me feel as if I’m the only one for her and other times she makes me feel as if she doesn’t want me.  As long as I’m spending money and things go her way, she’s happy.  When things aren’t rosy or I have an issue or need attention, she acts funny.  I’m beginning to feel like she’s using me but don’t know how to approach her.  How do I ask where I stand in this relationship?

Wayne Altus,
OK
Dear Wayne:
   You’re being used and have allowed yourself to become a financial sponsor.  If you can’t pull the money away and still get the girl, you have your answer.  She doesn’t give a damn about you and her emotions are tied to your money and what she can get out of you.  You can make an effort and let her know you’re scaling back on the spending and ask to have your needs met.  If she agrees to work on this, then stick with it.  If not, pack your bags and exit stage left.

Dear Deanna!
   I have a situation where I’ll be wrong no matter what happens.  My sister and I were talking and she made a comment that if I knew her husband was cheating, I probably wouldn’t tell her.  Imagine my surprise that she said this because he’s having an affair.  I’m the other woman and we’ve been seeing each other for a while.  I feel guilty because I think she’s suspicious, just not of me.  I need some help breaking this news to her.
Confused Sister               Jacksonville, MS

Dear Confused:
   Pull out a pen and add the words trifling, low-life and scandalous next to your face.  You need to let her husband know that you’re going to tell and then see how much he loves his wife when he lies, places all the blame on you and throws you under the bus.  If they stay together, your new title will be tramp while the family looks down upon you.  If he leaves, you won’t be on his list of selections.  Grow up and learn some family values and get your own man.